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Showing posts with label colbert. Show all posts
Showing posts with label colbert. Show all posts

Monday, March 30, 2009

satori, grandma's black eye, stephen colbert and other stuff too

Well to be honest, I've found my zen, or satori, or whatever buddhist word is appropriate here. I am pretty well in the hole but I've got nothing to lose. So I'm done stressing about it and am relatively quite a bit more peaceful.

And thanks to someone who is always there for me when I need him, I am nibbling on parmesan Goldfish. So good.

My grandma tripped and fell in a restaurant yesterday when she went to lunch with "the girls" after church. Apparently her face is pretty messed up and she can't even open one eye. I really don't know why I don't feel more terrible about this.

Tomorrow I must go visit Jill in the hospital (seriously Sarah. You must do this!). I feel like such a flaky friend. Ugh. And today I must do situps, pushups and arm curls(maybe). /: I've lost 3 of the 10 pounds I've recently gained but I also lost my abs which were just starting to be defined when I lost all motivation to exercise. But summer is pretty close and I dunno, every year I think THIS is the year I'm going to have a perfect body for summer. Although I don't even know where/when I will be exposing my body as I have no social life. I guess I could tan in my parents' back yard (:

Oh and I've been listening to Stephen Colbert's "I Am American and So Can You" on audiobook and he is hilarious. Some of my favorite quotes so far:

You can't spell parentry without 'try.' And you also can't spell emotional abuse without 'bus.' And that's why I don't take public transportation.

Yes, I consider the wallpaper industry part of the media. It has the word "paper" in it.

To their credit Mormonism's founders did something other self-proclaimed prophets throughout history had never thought of; They lived in America.


oh AND PS: This made me laugh. Karl Lagerfeld on Heidi Klum: "I don't know Heidi Klum. She was never known in France. Claudia Schiffer also doesn't know who she is."

oh and Wolfgang Joop calls her fat.
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